A look in the mirror

How hard can it be to list affirmations and intentions, with the intent to change habits or behavior in 21 days? Seems simple enough, right?

My dear cousin and I have dreams, and damnit if we are not going to see them happen! Our first of many steps – write the lists. She has hers done…and mine. Me? I have them in my head, and keep promising to get them on paper. I promise her, but it is I that suffers while they are avoided. She is already on week two, I am still here…with my excuses of ‘being frozen, don’t know where to begin, too much on my plate’.

It was suggested to me in a book I am reading, ‘Do you want your dreams or do you want your excuses? Cuz it takes a lot longer to come up with the excuses and execute them, than it does to take action toward your dreams’ – paraphrased of course in the manner I interpreted.

Someone else suggested in my monthly emails ‘you don’t even know what you want, what is enough…because you don’t know how to be satisfied. You don’t give yourself permission to be satisfied’…again, paraphrased.

I met with my ‘Financial Recovery Coach’ this week. I was pissed at how slow ‘this’ is changing/coming along. She, I am sure is struggling to not say, ‘I quit if you won’t do the work’…then she asked me a question, that when answered, it caught me off guard. ‘What is it that you want? Why are you here? What do you hope to accomplish, tell me what the reason you initially contacted me and agreed to work with me?’ It all spilled out with ease, clarity and sincerity. This is what caught me off guard. Me, with an answer to ‘what do I want?’ Because there is a lot that I want. To experience, to see, to have, to enjoy, to do. And not just about money. But the irony I found in my answers had to do with how much of my ‘wants’ in all matters, they begin with shifting this energy with money.

I have begun my list of affirmations to share with my cousin. And I let her know in these exact words, “…until I get this money energy shifted…all else will will be a waste of my energy….another business will be doomed if I already am struggling with how I handle money, a new relationship with a partner will fail as he would be a fool to hang out in such a mess with me, peace will not come when I am spending so much energy on money worries….I MUST shift this money energy!!”

Sometimes looking in the mirror, I hate what I find (figuratively). Sometimes it is what needs to happen, in order to love what I find.

I am on #7 of my affirmations. My intentions are clear. Life teaches us just fine when we take the time to listen to what we know, even if it catches us off guard! I want my dreams! What do you want?

Write it down. Keep asking, ‘anything more?’…. You might be surprised to find out what you didn’t know you know.Good luck to you my friends.

In humble gratitude,


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